How To Stop Feeling Llike Your Just Existing

Today, we’re talking about something that I know so many of you are feeling but maybe haven’t quite put into words: That feeling of just… existing. Like you’re moving through your days on autopilot, but you’re not really living.

You wake up, go through your routine, check the boxes, take care of responsibilities… but deep down, there’s this hollow feeling.

Like life is just happening to you rather than you actually experiencing it.

And I want you to know—you’re not alone.

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking:
“Is this all there is?”

“Why do I feel so disconnected from my own life?”
“I don’t even remember what makes me happy anymore.”

Then today’s episode is for you.

Transcript

Hey there, and welcome back to Aspire and Achieve with Annie! If you're new here, I’m Annie Lewellyn, life coach and fellow traveler on this wild journey of midlife transformation.

Today, we’re talking about something that I know so many of you are feeling but maybe haven’t quite put into words: That feeling of just… existing. Like you’re moving through your days on autopilot, but you’re not really living.

You wake up, go through your routine, check the boxes, take care of responsibilities… but deep down, there’s this hollow feeling.

Like life is just happening to you rather than you actually experiencing it.

And I want you to know—you’re not alone.

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking:

“Is this all there is?”

“Why do I feel so disconnected from my own life?”

“I don’t even remember what makes me happy anymore.”

Then today’s episode is for you.

Because here’s the truth: You are not meant to just exist. You are meant to LIVE. And today, I’m going to help you start breaking free from autopilot mode—so you can feel alive again.

I’ll share why this happens, what keeps us feeling stuck, and most importantly, I’ll give you a simple 5-minute daily practice that will help you reconnect with joy, purpose, and yourself again.

At the end of this episode, I’ll also share how you can take this journey even further with my Empty Nest Life Planner experience, designed specifically to help you create a life that excites you again.

So grab your coffee, take a deep breath, and let’s dive in.

Why We End Up in Autopilot Mode

I want to start by validating something: If you feel like you’re just going through the motions, it’s not your fault.

This isn’t something you chose—it’s something that happens to us over time.

Here’s how we get here:

You’ve Spent Decades Prioritizing Others Over Yourself

For so many of us—especially as mothers, partners, daughters, and caregivers—our lives have been centered around taking care of everyone else.

• You raised kids.
• You supported a spouse.
• You built a home, maybe a career.
• You spent YEARS making sure everyone else was okay.

And in the process?

You slowly lost pieces of yourself.

You stopped prioritizing your own passions, your own dreams, your own joy.

And now that life has shifted—maybe your kids have moved out, maybe your relationships have changed, maybe retirement is on the horizon—there’s this quiet emptiness that creeps in.

A feeling of: “What now?”

Routine Becomes a Comfort Zone That Turns Into a Cage

At first, routines bring stability—which we need!
But over time? They can also become traps.

•  You take the same route to the store.
•  You have the same conversations.
•  You eat at the same places.
•  You spend your evenings watching TV or scrolling on your phone.

Every day starts to feel like the last.

And before you know it, you feel like you’re living in black-and-white instead of full color.

Your world shrinks.
Your excitement fades.
And one day, you wake up and realize:
“I don’t even know what makes me happy anymore.”

Society Tells Us That Midlife is About Slowing Down

Let’s be honest—society doesn’t exactly celebrate women in midlife.

We hear messages like:

“You should start winding down.”
“It’s time to settle into a quieter life.”
“Your best years are behind you.”

And that subtle conditioning seeps into our beliefs.

We start thinking:
“Maybe I’m too old to start something new.”
“Maybe I should just accept that this is what life is now.”
“Maybe it’s selfish to want more.”

And THAT is how we end up stuck in autopilot mode.

But here’s what I need you to know:

• You are NOT too old.
• You are NOT out of options.
• You are NOT meant to just exist.

Midlife is NOT the end—it’s the beginning of something NEW.

You are ALLOWED to:

• Reignite your passions.
• Find new adventures.
• Try things you’ve never done before.
• Prioritize your own happiness for the first time in a long time.

And you do NOT have to overhaul your entire life to start feeling alive again.

You just need to take one small step—every single day.

Which brings me to today’s quick win…

If you’re feeling stuck in autopilot mode, this is your first step:

The “5-Minute Joy Reconnection” Practice

Step 1: Write down ONE thing that brought you joy today.
– It can be big or small—the way your coffee tasted, a song on the radio, a sunset.
– This retrains your brain to start noticing joy again.

Step 2: Do ONE small thing every day that excites you.
– Try a new recipe.
– Take a different route on your walk.
– Listen to a song from your youth that makes you feel alive.

Step 3: Say this affirmation every morning:
“I deserve joy. I am allowed to explore, to play, to dream. Today, I choose to live fully.”

It takes just 5 minutes a day, but over time, it will wake something up inside you—a spark, a new energy, a feeling that YES, you are meant for more.

If today’s episode spoke to you—if you feel that ache inside, that longing to feel alive again—I want you to know:

• You don’t have to stay stuck.
• You don’t have to settle for just existing.
• You have the power to bring joy back into your life—starting today.

And you don’t have to figure it out alone.

To help you take that first step, I’ve created something special just for you—my Rediscovering Joy Workbook.

This workbook is filled with simple but powerful exercises to help you:

• Reignite your passions
• Identify what truly lights you up
• Start making small but meaningful shifts in your daily life

Because joy isn’t something you have to chase—it’s something you can create.

You can grab your FREE copy right now, the link is in the show notes.

And before we go, I want you to hear this:

You are not done.
You are not too old.
You are not meant to fade into the background.

This is your time to explore, to dream, to laugh, to fall in love with life again.

Because you are STILL here.
And that means there is STILL more life left to live.

So today—just take one small step.
Download the workbook.
Try the 5-minute joy practice.
Say YES to yourself again.

Because you? You are meant to THRIVE.

I’ll see you next week, and until then—go find your joy.